Abraham Kuyper was quoted in “Be Still, My Soul Embracing God’s
Purpose & Provision in Suffering” a collection of popular authors.
The soul
is thus like a sentinel who lets himself be shot down at his post and, in
dying, enjoys the approving look at his general. And he rejoices therin,
because he knows, and sees, that the general, who ordered him to death, yet
loved him.”
When I first read this why would anyone allow this to happen? Where
was the self-preservation that we all have to survive? Suddenly Galations 2:20 “I
have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The
life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of Go, who loved me and
gave himself for me.” From the
NIV
While living in Annapolis I would spend my summer days by the
ocean basking in the sun and swimming in its waters. One day while swimming I
had swam out far enough where my feet could not touch the bottom and I laid on
my back relaxed. Bible verse flooded my heart and engulfed my mind. This verse
came to mind and I asked God what it would be like to be in heaven, in his
presence. A small voice said, go deep into the water where you are surrounded
by the ocean. Close your eyes and invasion yourself one with the water, like a
jellyfish. Down I submerged myself, closed my eyes, and imagined. I imagined
the water was God, it was around me, through me, part of me, and we were one.
Peace like I have never felt before or since filled me. Not sure how long I was
under the water but it seemed like hours. As I came to the surface I knew what
my life mission was. To be with Him, bring Him glory, honor, but most important
to share this with others.
It was almost 2 years ago the news of my cancer shot me down,
in front of my commander. As I fell wounded it was my goal to praise him in
always. While I fell to the ground not knowing my fate, my eyes never left his.
Now a few years have slipped by and I am atop of the wall
again with Him by my side. Not sure when another arrow will pierce me and the
results of the piercing would be death. Yet, I don’t fear death because I have
died once to self the hardest death to do, which leaves physical death which is
a walk in the park as God lives in me, and gives me strength to carry one. With
him nothing is impossible.
